霸王恐龙 发表于 2009-1-18 10:16   全显示 1楼
看完这篇短篇
好像没有什么感觉
觉得作者只是太专注的叙述某一件事情
强生和周晶之间的事情
性描写的太简单了
都没有撩起读者的什么好奇的心里
我觉得如果再把性描写加以润色
写得更加详细点生动点细致点
就应该是一篇蛮好的色文了
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  • feifei777 金币 +4 回复认真 2009-1-18 22:50
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